Yet, Once Again!

Those of you who have known me for a while will not be surprised to know that the Queen of Klutz has done it once again. Fortunately, this time is not as bad as the time in France, which I have not yet had enough nerve to discuss in a blog. This time it was slightly more than stepping off a curb, since this time I was riding my brand new bicycle. 1HW and I have been busily and happily riding our bicycles since Thanksgiving. Both of us have shiny maroon Trek Navigator Mountain Comfort Bikes, the same company who provides wheels for Lance Armstrong, but, obviously for us, different models. These have higher handle bars so we do not have to bend over, which would kill both of our backs. Yesterday we decided to take two spins around the park, roughly 1 1/2 to 2 miles, before sitting in the hot tub to relieve our aches and pains. It was on the way back to the RV when the accident occurred.

We were rounding the bend toward the straight-away, pedaling hard against the breeze, when I noticed 1HW point to something over on the left. I thought maybe there was something or someone there, and I looked hard to see what it was, but saw nothing, and prepared to hang a quick right. Unfortunately, he was gesturing to tell me to go strauight ahead, and then he slowed down to make sure I caught it. BOY! Did I ever catch it! Smack! I went straight into his rear wheel, causing a kamikaze effect quite rapidly! Thoughts flashed through my pea-brain, that my shiny, new bike could get hurt, so I braced for the fall and pulled the bike on top of me. Not too bright, huh. Well, the bike survived in excellent shape, but we just cannot say the same for me. Alas, I am among the walking wounded, a veritable disaster area. Sad to say, as it was a warm day here, I was wearing shorts and a T-shirt, so my right knee and leg got badly scraped, as did my right elbow and arm, right smack into the graveled road. Just lovely. However, that was nothing compared to my head. I smashed my glasses into my face as I hit my head, so immediately a huge goose egg began to pop up between my eye and my hairline. It was a bit like watching Mt. Vesuvius rise from the ashes, or at least it sure felt that way to me. So we pedaled home, put ice on the head right away, and my sweet husband sponged off my wounds which were bleeding all over. He then knew that anesthesia was in order and poured a light Scotch and soda with a twist of lemon, to soothe my new aches and pains. As you can probably guess, I did not sleep too well last night.

This morning, there was an even greater delight as I looked into the mirror and saw a nice black and blue area from the corner of my eye up my forehead, beautifully coloring the large lump. I had an appointment to see my favorite hair stylist for a hair cut this morning, and he could not have been more sympathetic. "Oh, my God, Hon, what HAPPENED? Oh, you poor baby!" That was followed by, "It's a good thing we got your bangs longer! We'll just cover that up!" And, later, "Now, when that starts to turn green, just put some pink powder or eyeshadow over it to neutralize the color!" Now how can one ask for anything more sympathetic and helpful than that?

And, you just have to know how wonderful my dear, sweet husband has been. He keeps trying to blame himself, but really, all of us know how I am, and it was not his fault. He not only cleaned me up and gave me anesthetic, he decided I shouldn't cook, either. And then he remembered that the Kentucky Colonel wasn't too far away. Now, I ask you, how much better can it get than that? Hmmm... I do remember he saw a commercial for the Colonel and had been wanting some, but beggars can't be choosers! Besides, I now feel thoroughly cossetted and terrifically spoiled. And, best of all, my bicycle doesn't have a ding! Maybe tomorrow....